Current numbers

Okay - I have a lot of catching up to do.  Here are our monthly numbers through April:

January:  #43 girls
               #34 boys
February:  #41 girls
                 #31 boys
March:  #36 girls
             #28 boys -- (whoot whoot in the twenties!)
April: #35 girls
          #26 boys

It's actually kind of fun to put the numbers together like this to see the progress.  SO wish we were further down on both lists, but at least movement is happening.  We are VERY excited to have broken through to the twenties on the boys list.  Now for the girls list!  The girls list is gaining on the boys, though.  When we started this process we were #98 on the girls list and #74 on the boys.  The gap has narrowed!  Maybe "J" is a little girl??? (Thought it was probably a boy since we got on the lists.)  Can't wait to be surprised with the sex of our new little one!

The following song is a true testament to why we are adopting.  When your heart has been broken by the love of Christ - how can you live life as usual?

Meredith Andrews

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6iuKyXdpfg

Blessings,

Ashley

Waiting...

Wow.  Can you believe it?  I am actually posting!  UGH.  There is no reason why I have not posted since December, except that blogging seems to be the one thing that always gets pushed to the bottom of the "to do" list.  I promise to post more often, but I don't.  Leads me to the scripture where Paul says "I do not understand what I do.  For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do" (Romans 7:15).  So - please pray for me that I will be more committed.  Not just in blogging, but all aspects of my life.  As I have posted before, "Somewhere In the Middle" is, unfortunately, a theme song for me.  I have deep-water faith in the shallow end.  God wants to "spit me out"(Revelation 3:16) because I am luke warm.  I'm tired of living like that, but unsure of how to get out of this rut.  That is why I covet your prayers!

Our spring has been fairly busy.  Both kids are involved in school sports.  Between practices, games, stress fractures and pulled muscles, I think it's good the seasons are coming to an end!  Both kids are doing well in school and looking forward to a fun-filled summer.  

Watson playing lacrosse for his school, Harding Academy

Evanne being goofy in target

We continue to patiently (ha) wait for "J's" arrival to our family.  The waiting has been hard, but we trust God's timing.  If we say we do, and we TRUELY do, then we have to rest in that assurance!  I was asked recently how long are we going to wait.  Well, we believe we have been called to adopt from Ethiopia.  The wait has been, and continues to be, frustrating and HARD.  However - we will wait as long as God asks us to wait!  We weren't called into adoption "only if we got a child within a year...then we're done, or whatever human parameters we put on it.  This is God's will, not ours.  We will wait, and we will worship while we wait knowing His perfect timing is the ONLY timing we care to live in!   That being said - we need prayer to live that out!!!  This was said on our adoption agency's Ethiopian facebook page by another mother who has been through the waiting.  She got it from studylight.org and I think it helps for us to look at this, and all of life, through the lens of Christ.

"It isn't easy to wait, especially where matters of the heart are concerned.  But no Christian is mature until he or she has learned to wait.  Perhaps this is the word the Lord has for you today - wait.  Are you feeling spiritually restless at the moment, straining at the leash and anxious to press ahead on some point that needs further thought and prayer?  Well, here is His word again -wait.  A purpose far wiser than you can ever conceive of is being worked out for you.  A heart more infinitely loving than any other you will ever know is caring for you.  A mind greater than yours is planning for you.  So...wait!" 

AMEN!

Blessings,

Ashley

Thanksgiving for God's blessings

We had a blessed Thanksgiving!  We had family join us for a beautiful meal and visit.  The long weekend was wonderful and the Christmas decorations are "almost" finished!  The weather was amazing and we were able to rest and rejuvenate.  It was awesome to re-live our blessings throughout 2011.  We are blessed beyond belief with friends, health, family, and the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ!

The "Dillbillies", running/walking in the annual "Boulevard Bolt" 

in Belle Meade, Thanksgiving morning

We received our official November numbers over the holiday.  We are currently 49 on the girls list and 37 on the boys list.  Yes - no movement.  And -yes - moved back one on the boys list.  "How do you move backwards," you ask?  A family lost their referral for a son.  The birthmother decided not to give her son for adoption, after all.  We are praying for the sweet couple having to deal with the loss of a referral, but are rejoicing the birth family can stay together.  We are praying that God will sustain this mother and son in the months and years to come.  We know He has a plan - a good and perfect plan - and we are trusting in Him.   Although we are disappointed in no positive movement this month, we are uplifted by your prayers and God's amazing grace.  

We really thought we would have little "J" by now...

Our adoption agency, AGCI, put this message in their November newsletter to encourage each family on their journey.  It's worth repeating as we continue to trust in HIM...

"You have chosen a hard road in adoption - the road less traveled - and while God knew it would be hard, He still called you to this.  He has asked you to step out in this adventure.  He has placed on your hearts a specific child and is working to bring together your stories.  Why this particular journey?  We do not know God's reasons for the specifics of each of your journeys.  We do know, though, that He knew this journey when you started.  He still wants you on this path, and the child that you are waiting for - the child He asked you to trek this journey for - is worth that wait in whatever stage of the process you find yourself today."

Please pray for patience and peace.  He is the Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:7).  

Here's to lower numbers come January!

Blessings,

Ashley

Cool Story - God has a plan!

Before I share the story, let me announce our official October numbers:

#49 girl

#36 boy

We didn't get our numbers this time until October 28th.  That is REALLY late!  We are glad to see a little movement, but are praying for more during the month of November.  We really thought we would at least have a referral by now.  It seems crazy to think that we could be waiting for "J" another 9-12 months.  Things are moving slowly without a clear reason as to why.  The courts closed in Ethiopia mid-August through October.  Now that the courts have re-opened, hopefully things will start to move again.   Unfortunately, even before the government shut-down, there wasn't much movement.  If I allow myself to think too long about it, I get so sad!  So - I have to just press on and turn it over to the Lord.  HIS timing is perfect and I pray for patience in the waiting.  We will have to start re-doing some of our paperwork as some are time-sensitive and may expire soon.  We know the wait will be worth it once we see our precious "J".  Please pray for our journey!

OKAY - here is the cool story of God's divine providence in our lives.  

My reaction as my Mother-in-Law tells the story

As our family sat around the table on Christmas Eve 2010, my mother-in-law, Marilyn Dill, tells us that she has something to give us.  She begins to tell the story of her mother, Mary Valentine (aka GiGi), crocheting baby blankets for all of her great-grandchildren.  GiGi never met her great-grandchildren in this life, but made baby blankets that she gave to Marilyn to give to the children as they were born.  I have treasured both Evanne's and Watson's blankets.  David's brother, Chris and wife, Michelle, also have two children that have each received blankets, as well.  Marilyn gave each blanket to each child upon birth, knowing that four blankets is all that her mother had made before she passed away in 1993.  We announced our plans for adoption to the family in August of 2010.  When my mother-in-law was pulling things out of a drawer to decorate for Christmas, she discover another baby blanket that her mother had crocheted!  Marilyn had been rummaging through that same drawer for years, unaware that another blanket existed.   She did not remember her mother making "five" blankets - but there it was - just for "J"! 

God's plans are not our own.  He provides before we know ourselves what we need.  Now "J" also has the inheritance of a blanket from his/her great-grandmother, who in her divine wisdom made one more "just in case".  How awesome is that?!?!?

Blessings,

Ashley

Where are my actions?

"Sometimes I would like to ask God why He allows poverty,

suffering and injustice when he could do something about it."

"Well, why don't you ask Him?"

"Because I'm afraid He would ask me the same question."

-Anonymous

That stings a bit, doesn't it?  We have been blessed BEYOND belief!  I am good at talking the talk, but where are my actions?  I give - but truth be told - usually not until it hurts or I really "feel" the sacrifice.  What does God think of that?  Do the blessings I encounter everyday mean anything if I don't pay them forward?  Following are the lyrics to "Somewhere in the Middle" by Casting Crowns.  This song brings me to my knees every time I hear it.  So why don't I live my life full-throttle for Jesus?  Why am I always "somewhere in the middle"?  

Somewhere between the hot and the cold

Somewhere between the new and the old

Somewhere between who I am and who I used to be

Somewhere in the middle you'll find me

Somewhere between the wrong and the right

Somewhere between the darkness and the light

Somewhere between who I was and who You're making me

Somewhere in the middle, You'll find me

Just how close can I get Lord, to my surrender without losing all control

Fearless warrior on the picket fence, reckless adondon wrapped in common sense

Deep water faith in the shallow end and we are caught in the middle

With eyes wide open to the differences, the God who was and the God who is

But will we trade our dreams for His

or our we caught in the middle

Somewhere between my heart and my hands

Somewhere between my faith and my plans

Somewhere between the safety of the boat and the crashing waves

Somewhere between a whisper and a roar

Somewhere between the alter and the door

Somewhere between centered peace and always wanting more

Somewhere in the middle You'll find me

Just how close can I get Lord, to my surrender without losing all control

Lord, I feel You in this place and I know You're by my side

Loving me even on these nights, when I'm caught in the middle

I don't want to live my life stuck "in the middle".  Lord, help me to surrender fully to Your will and purpose for me!  Help me get out of the safety of the boat and go DEEP with YOU.  Thank you for loving me despite myself!  Keep working in me and through me to bring glory to Your name! 

Blessings,


Ashley

September numbers and such...

Ok - I know it's November 3rd!  Yes - we got our September numbers toward the end of September.  We were #52 on girls list and #39 on boys.  It was exciting to be in the thirties on the boys list!  Progress is still SO slow, though...

We were at an event in late August for Kids Across America (KAA).  KAA is a ministry that serves urban and inner-city kids by giving them a summer camp experience in Branson, MO.  It is a wonderful organization that we are proud to be a part of.  The fund-raiser was held at Michael W. Smith's farm in Franklin, TN.  It was a fun evening in "the barn" with wonderful entertainment!  The highlight of the evening for us was getting to hear Brandon Heath live - and meeting him afterward!  He is a a down-to-earth, kind young man.  He was excited to hear that his song "Give Me Your Eyes" (which he sang for us that night) plays right hear on our blog!  I took pictures with my phone, so, with no flash, the quality is pretty bad :-(  You can tell it's him, though.  Thanks, Brandon, for having a heart set on spreading the Good News of Jesus and for calling us to account through your music!

Evanne and Brandon

Brandon singing "Give Me Your Eyes"

Ed Cash and Mariah Peters 

(She's gonna be BIG - watch for her)

So blessed to have our family with us that night!

Callie, Briana, Brandon, and Ashlyn

Picture quality not so good - but the evening was fabulous!  To find out more about this wonderful ministry, log onto kidsacrossamerica.org.

Blessings,
Ashley

Where are my eyes focused?

Got our August official numbers.  We are currently 60 on the girls list and 42 on the boys list.  Although not a lot of movement, it is great that we moved!  We started at 98 on the girls list, so have moved 38 spots since late January.  We started at 74 on the boys list, so have moved 32 spaces in 7 months.  If it takes that long to move that many spaces, we should have a child in the next 9-18 months.  Wow - hadn't done the math until now.  Kind of depressing.  We really hoped to have little "J" in our arms by the first of the year.  AGCI told us it would be about 12-18 months, so we are on the right trajectory for that time-frame.  UGH!  Truth be told, we are on God's time-frame, so that's what I need to focus on!  Keep my eyes on Jesus!  Oh, Lord, help me to do that please!!!

Blessings,

Ashley